Valentine's Day. The consumer driven blah holiday fed by blubbering Hallmark marketing campaigns, overly rouge window displays in every flower shop of every city and sappy, black and white "forever" diamond commercials. Truth is, most men try to redeem themselves for 364 days of shitty behavior with 1 day of chocolate and flowers. And women, suckers that they are, get taken in like the overly emotional creatures that they are. Granted, some men, those who aren't quite so crappy in the boyfriend/husband/significant other department, use this day to further their "good partner" cause. Now, who can find fault with that? Well, it seems to me that February 14th shouldn't be the only day a man should go out of his way for his partner. V-Day was conceived by some upstart marketing guru and now is "the day" for generous displays of affection. I wonder, quite relevantly, what is so hard about making February 13th just as sappy as February 14th? They are both days of the month, both seemingly enjoy a day/night cycle, both have weather patterns (snow in Toronto, rain in London), and they both require you to wake up, work and then go to sleep. Similar in all the ways that count right? So, why can't I get flowers on the 13th and the 14th?
The case against V-Day is simple....it is not the only day that matters. You want to be a great boyfriend? Be one on April 17th, May 5th, June 21st, July 8th, August 28th, September 12th, October 2nd, November 30th, December 4th, and January 16th. That is a random sample of days throughout the year, just as random as February 14th. This gives you a once-a-month opportunity to expect flowers, chocolate, maybe even a diamond, instead of selling yourself short for one day, one February 14th, every year. Once a year, or once a month? I know what my choice would be. If I could push it I might even argue for twice a month, but considering the fact that the male population can barely get it together for major holidays, let alone V-Day, I make my case simple. Once a month. Set your sights higher than him walking into a Pharmacy to buy some ridiculous card in the shape of the heart simply because he couldn't miss the huge display. Yes, chocolates are good, maybe he should buy you some truffles on a random day, when he doesn't have to, when nobody is watching, when nobody is reminding him, when, well, he just wants to.
I have never celebrated V-Day. I was either single, dating an asshole, or simply irritated by the idea that only one day of the year was allocated to be generous with ones love. This year, yes, I am far happier with who is in my life on V-Day. Noel is a sweetheart, a nice guy who means a little more to me than a corny holiday, but who gets my candy hearts all the same. And maybe it's him who has made me start thinking about what the other side of V-Day looks like, the side where the corniness is lost and true and honest expressions of love are found.
My lovely roommate, Lena, received a bouquet of flowers from her boyfriend back in Canada. He's a nice guy who obviously knows the caliber of girlfriend he has (she's a pretty awesome girl) and did something incredibly sweet, and from what I gathered, totally unlike him. He is neither mushy, nor sappy, and this gesture, one completely mushy and sappy, stands out to me as the quintessential non-V-Day, V-Day expression of love. He's the exception to the rule because his desire to show his love was facilitated by V-Day not dictated by it. Therefore, he gave to give, and V-Day was just as good an opportunity as February 13th, except I'm sure he understood what opening that box would be like for her, what it would mean to her. And I understand that. Her smile, her giddiness, the happiness just radiating from her was enough to redeem this holiday for me. Perhaps, behind all the corny pinkness of it all, there are people who receive genuine happiness from being remembered by those they love. And yes, in that moment I felt Lena deserved that happiness, not only because she's a great person, but because, just maybe, February 14th was her day. It was her time to get the unexpected, to hope a little for that something wonderful, to find herself falling back in love with the man in her life. Even though this holiday is created by the spinning minds of those that make a giant monetary profit from it, they do not get to enjoy the best part. I've realized the best part of February 14th is not the gifts you receive as a result of shrewd marketing, but that smile of happiness, those tears of joy, that feeling of love. I say if a day of cliche madness makes people feel good, then who am I to bitch about it?
Thanks to that same roommate I have a box of cinnamon candy hearts, that I've already managed to get halfway through, and seeing as they are my favorite candy and that they only come around for the 14th of February I found my own reason to like V-Day. Cinnamon candy hearts. Thank you Lent for making Lena unable to eat these sugary sweets, thank you to her mom for not knowing Lena gave up sugar for Lent when she got her that candy, thanks to me, for being at the right place at the right time, and finally thank you, V-Day, for being the catalyst for the production of the greatest candy concoction in the world....cinnamon, candy hearts. Mmmm. I love me some V-Day.
No comments:
Post a Comment